More than words
The all-encompassing Indian head jiggle
Any kid who grew up in the United States during the 1980s knows the joys of Saturday morning cartoons. Waking up early and seeing those familiar characters every week felt comforting and exciting. Every 5 minutes or so, there would be a commercial for some neon colored candy or cool new brand of cereal my parents never bought. Usually there would also be a PSA (public service announcement) tucked somewhere in there as well. “This is your brain. This is your brain on drugs.” The fried egg image is forever seared into my memory.
I know I watched those cartoons from start to finish, religiously, every single Saturday, but now as a 40 something year old I can only recall a few of them. One that stands out the most is the Smurfs. Did any of you watch them? I loved the Smurfs!
For those of you who aren’t familiar, the Smurfs are little blue creatures that live in the forest. They often have names that mimic the role they play; Handy Smurf was the carpenter, Lazy Smurf was the narcoleptic, Papa Smurf was the patriarch, and so on and so on. They were constantly outsmarting their nemesis, Gargamel, and his evil cat, Azriel, who were always hatching wicked ideas to catch the Smurfs. Now, compared to the digital animation of today, Smurfs would be considered the Commodore 64 of cartoons, but in the 80s, they were cutting edge!
One of the most iconic parts of the Smurfs is their use of the word “smurfy”. This word is a chameleon and has a trillion meanings, some of which include but are not limited to: awesome, bad, tired, rude, delicious, absolutely, etc. “That was real smurfy of you!” is a statement that could mean any number of things, and without context, you would be blind to its interpretation.
No other word has that kind of flexibility, nay, that kind of POWER, but 7 months ago, I was exposed to a gesture that certainly does. Let me introduce you to the Indian head jiggle. This movement is used indiscriminately and with hearty abundance by Indians everywhere. What does it mean, one might ask. To which I would reply, anything, everything, and, who knows?
I often feel the same way as Andre the Giant felt every time Vizzini theatrically exclaimed “Inconceivable!” Do I think this head wiggle means what they think it means? In that, the jiggler may mean it one way, but the jigglee (me) may understand it completely different.
Take for instance the time I was in immigration with my youngest son. We were coming back to India from Sri Lanka, and my husband and 3 other kids had gone through first and were waiting on our bags. My youngest has an OCI (Overseas Citizen of India) card but whoever was on typewriter duty that day, spelled his middle name wrong. Even with precise, notarized, triplication of forms and duplication of website data entry, once everything got passed to the guy at the Indian Embassy that day, it all went to Hell in a handbasket. He typed an unnecessary “D” to the end of my son’s middle name, laminated the page, patted himself on the back for another job well done, and drove to his cataract-removal surgery.
We have since had to explain this mistake to multiple airline and immigration agents who catch the discrepancy between his OCI and his passport. So, I knew exactly what was happening while we waited patiently behind the glass partition, and I was prepared to explain.
After a minute, the agent quietly asked his coworker to come look at the two documents. They commiserated in hushed whispers, some computer buttons were pressed, the mouse was clicked a few times, and finally an exasperated sigh was let out by the agent. “Sir, is there a problem?” I asked. He replied with an Indian head jiggle. “There is?!” I worriedly exclaimed. A smaller, tighter jiggle was given in return. “Is that a yes?!” I asked, in a higher pitch. Finally, his coworker leaning over to help, says a simple, “No, Madam.” Well, why didn’t you just say that in the first place, I thought! Only guess what? He did. Clearly and emphatically.
The Indian head jiggle could throw even the most papered and well-bred bloodhound off the scent with its confusing, open-ended reply. The head jiggle is the Rubik’s Cube of gestures, with endless possibilities, combinations, and meanings! A potential real-life situation could be as follows: “Do you have laddu?” you might ask a bakery worker. Head jiggle. “Uhhh, you do, ma’am?” Head jiggle. “Wait, you do not?” Head jiggle. “Ama?” (This means “yes”). Head jiggle. Wait, “Ilai?” (This means no). “Laddu irukkah?” (Do you have laddu?) Head jiggle.
Listen friends. You may never know if that bakery has any delicious, sweet laddu. You may never know if the milk man is going to return to your home. You may never know if your luggage is overweight at the airport. These things, and many more, will become life’s greatest mysteries until you unlock the Rosetta Stone of the Indian head jiggle. Part of the wild and beautiful culture here in India, is that even though there are over 1,000 languages spoken, this simple gesture transcends them all.
Basically, the Indian head jiggle means whatever you want it to mean. My husband calls it the Swiss Army Knife of communication here. Once you understand how it’s being used in any given situation, you realize you’ve unlocked the next level of the game! You finally understand a little more and can be understood a little more. Congratulations! Some helpful, beginner translations of the head jiggle are as follows:
Yes.
No.
Okay.
I don’t understand you.
I totally understand you.
No way.
That’s great!
That’s dumb.
Oh, really?
No, thanks.
Yes, please.
You’re an idiot!
You’re a genius!
I literally didn’t even hear what you said.
I’m pretending to care what you said.
I’ve come to notice that even I will jiggle my head as I reply to questions or ask my own. My husband does it, too. Have we begun to take on physical mimicking movements along our path of assimilation? Even if locals cannot understand my words, I hope that my slight head jiggle will give comfort to them that maybe communication is actually happening, even subconsciously. If this is the case, and I think it is, it would be absolutely smurfy.
(Below is a quick tutorial of the jiggle. I squint and furrow my brow for some reason, but you don’t need to. Make your head jiggle, your own!)
Absolutely spot on hilarious! Brilliant descriptives! By the way, we did buy those ridiculously unhealthy cereals along with the cookies which you kids would hide under the healthy groceries in the basket when I wasn't looking! ;)